Reviews of Beyond Birds & Bees

Reviews of Beyond Birds & Bees

Parents who attended the Beyond Birds & Bees Workshop in the past had this to say:

"I walked into Katie's class knowing I'd learn a thing or two and walked out with cornerstone information that every parent should know. After completing the class, as if on cue, my kids did everything Katie said they'd do. Although I had never been down this road before, Katie gave me a map and a plan for getting through this part of parenting. So, when I heard my son and his friend giggling in the bathroom, I knew what to expect and how to respond appropriately." (Louise, mother of a 4 and 6 year old.)

"It helped me reflect on what was not discussed when I was growing up and how that affected me. I came away from the workshop ready to educate my son the way that I want to, rather than just letting him learn from peers or in health class." (Judy, mother of a 3 year old.)

"Since our kids are still small, I wasn't sure how this workshop would apply to us. But with all the conversations that started during my first child's potty-training, I realize this is the perfect time for us to create a family climate that welcomes questions and promotes open dialog." (Amy, mother of a 3 and 5 year old.)

"I learned so much from the workshop that I can't wait to take it again when my daughter gets a little older. It really boosts a parent's confidence to learn from a professional how to talk about sexuality with your kids! I now know how to answer questions that I would have stumbled over before. Thanks, Katie!" (Shelly, mother of a 3 year old)

"I'll be honest. There are about 10,000 things I'd rather do than read parenting books. I've done it, but only when I feel compelled. I care deeply about my role as a father, but just the thought of self-help makes me think of 12-step programs and situational narcolepsy. That's probably immature, but that's how I react. Anyway, this class offers a completely different experience. Other parents are there in a relaxed atmosphere sharing experiences, and Katie, an expert in child development, structures the discussion, ensuring that we cover all the essential topics. Even better, you practice responding to those questions or situations that come from left field and cause lots of uhh-ms, or the lame "that's a good question for your mother." It has already helped me respond wisely to my kids when they ask questions or do the things curious kids naturally do, so I definitely recommend it." (RT, father of 2)

“I think that every parent would get something from this.” (Jason, father to 2)

“So helpful & thought-provoking”

“Excellent presenter with great information”

“information is very clear… easy to take home and use!”

“No matter what your child’s age is, you will take home something valuable out of this class.”

“Every parent should take this class”

“… fantastic job. The Q & A and role plays are great!”

“The info provided was stuff we could go home and apply.”

“Casual, comfortable, fun environment”

“Valuable for any parent or caregiver.”

“Great open forum Q & A sessions. Got me thinking about situations I need to be prepared for.”

“Coming from a very uncommunicative upbringing, this class helped tremendously with putting things into perspective.”

“Extremely interesting and helpful. Learned a new term—‘vulva.’”

“you used words & language that made a touchy subject much less intimidating to discuss.”

“Loved it. Very thought and conversation-provoking.”

“It was too fun! We loved it!”

“I thought 3 hours would be too long, but we could’ve talked all evening!”

“Wonderful!”

“Loved your style of teaching & your class content.”

“Very good class, handled tough questions well.”

“Excellent presentation. Class was very informative and exciting!”

“Role-playing games were great!”

“Great class—very open and straightforward.”

“The situations and role-playing were very helpful. The topic is so very helpful just to talk about. You are very comfortable to listen to. Thank you for having this class available.”

“You are the best presenter I’ve listened to!”

Beyond Birds and Bees Workshops

Beyond Birds & Bees--for Fathers Only!

~Everything a DAD! needs to teach healthy sexuality to his kids~

(YES! This, finally, is the fathers-only BBB workshop!)

It’s never too early to think about talking with your kids about sex—because the earlier you start, the easier—and more effective—the conversations will be.

This workshop will cover:

• Age-appropriate 'Sex Ed.'
• Normal Sexual Behaviors, from birth to pre-adolescence
• Red Flag Behaviors: when to worry and what to do
• What's an "askable parent", and how to be one
• Typical questions kids ask, and how to answer them!

This is a fun, relaxed workshop filled with great information. Not only does the workshop include presentation and discussion--but you'll be amazed how much you'll learn and discover from the practice conversations and activities. Additionally, there is plenty of time built in for Q & A. Katie is a licensed therapist specializing in children & families, so bring your questions!

When:
This class meets on 2 consecutive Mondays: December 1 & 8, from 7:30-9pm.

To register:
Click here for online registration, or you can mail a check if you prefer.

Cost: $65 per person.

Feel free to email or call with any questions. Email: beyondbirdsandbees AT gmail DOT com Phone: 940-4477

Update: a dad who took the BBB workshop in the past recently sent me this very nice recommendation for anyone considering the workshop... "I'll be honest. There are about 10,000 things I'd rather do than read parenting books. I've done it, but only when I feel compelled. I care deeply about my role as a father, but just the thought of self-help makes me think of 12-step programs and situational narcolepsy. That's probably immature, but that's how I react. Anyway, this class offers a completely different experience. Other parents are there in a relaxed atmosphere sharing experiences, and Katie, an expert in child development, structures the discussion, ensuring that we cover all the essential topics. Even better, you practice responding to those questions or situations that come from left field and cause lots of uhh-ms, or the lame "that's a good question for your mother." It has already helped me respond wisely to my kids when they ask questions or do the things curious kids naturally do, so I definitely recommend it."

Teen pregnancy in the news, again...

By now, you've probably heard that the Republican VP candidate (Sarah Palin) has a 17 year old daughter who is pregnant. I've posted on this topic before here, and I encourage you to check out that older post, because it defines & discussed teachable moments in greater detail.

But for today's purposes, I just want to remind parents of school-aged kids that this is a great opportunity for you to connect with your child on a delicate & important topic. Ask your child if they've heard the news... ask what they think... ask if anyone they know knows a teen parent... talk about how this reminds us that teen pregnancy can occur in any & every home (even the governor's mansion!) Maybe you'll even get to talk about how teen pregnancy can be avoided. But no matter what comes of the conversation, if you will just have a conversation about this with your child (where you do a little more listening than talking) you'll be demonstrating again and again what an askable parent you are.

Book Review: Changing You!

I recently happened upon the book Changing You: A Guide to Body Changes and Sexuality by Dr. Gail Saltz. It's a book on sexuality that was published last year. In the Beyond Birds & Bees workshop I recommend that parents buy a book about sex for their kids every year or so, so I was pleased to find a new one to review.

Changing You is about 30 pages long, and illustrated with cartoon-style illustrations. It briefly addresses: puberty, boy genital names & pubertal changes, girl genitals and pubertal changes, erections, menstruation, hair growth, sexual intercourse, fertilization, pregnancy, birth, and breastfeeding. It very, very briefly mentions masturbation and hints at sexual abuse (at almost the same time--saying that it's normal to touch your own body but that you shouldn't let anyone else do so.) All in all, a good run-down of the basics.

Here's what I liked about it:

• The target reader age of this book seems to be around 8-9, an age group that seems to be hard to write about sex to... everything seems to be too young or too old.
  
• The text of this book is great--direct, age-appropriate, and clear. There aren't too many words, either (my biggest complaint about "It's So Amazing").
• Happily the correct terminology for a woman's external genitalia is used. (That's "vulva," fyi.)
  
• Two notes to parents provide great information about talking with your child about sex.
• The photos and tone of the book overall are very positive.
  

Here's what I did not like about the book:

• Nocturnal erections are only hinted at. Alongside a photo of a boy in bed with an erection under his sheets is the description: "Some mornings, it's not just the sun that rises..." I think we can do better than hints. Let's name names and give our sons (and daughters) at least the basic facts. Come to think of it, I'd of preferred a bit more teaching about what masturbation and sexual abuse are, too.
  
• When defining sexual intercourse, it says: "When a man and a woman love each other and decide that they want to have a child, they will do something called 'sexual intercourse' ". Welllllll, that isn't exactly true, is it? Last time I checked, people were having sex at times other than when they wanted to reproduce. Ahem.
• Some of the illustrations look a little weird, particularly the ones of the naked boy and girl, where body parts are named. Their bodies are virtually squares. Again, I think we can do better. A more realistic representation of a body is appropriate--no child will recognize themselves in a square.
  

So, I would recommend this book for:

• girls
• ages 8 or so,
• who are moderately interested in sexuality issues, and
  
• who are not asking lots of detailed questions yet.

I would not recommend this book for:

• boys, as the illustrations have lots of hearts, flowers, and the color pink... not themes that traditionally appeal to boys. Plus, the data on erections/boy body changes just isn't sufficient.
  
• a child who has already started the puberty process, or one who is searching for details and in-depth information. The information is just too basic.

In summary, I'm definitely going to add this to my list of recommended books, for the age range between "What's the big Secret" and "It's so Amazing." It's a great resource for young girls who are searching for basic info on sex and puberty.

If You Could Talk to Dr. Ruth...

I recently volunteered to review Dr. Ruth's new book Dr. Ruth's Guide to Teens and Sex Today for Parent: Wise Austin magazine. It's a win-win situation: I get a free copy of a book that I might have purchased anyway, I have some incentive/accountability to read a new book that relates to my work, and if I write something coherent/useful, I might get a paragraph published in the magazine. So I was pretty excited about picking up the book on Monday. But once I had it in my hand, a letter fell out of the front. It's a letter from the publisher, highlighting all the ways the book is great and media outlets will want to promote it. And then at the very end, it says... and Dr. Ruth is now available for phone interviews about this book.

Whoa! Interview Dr. Ruth? Really? Wow.

A quick Wikipedia scan tells me that she's 4'7", 80 years old, and was born in Germany. Jewish, she lost both of her parents in the Holocaust. She's a mother of two, grandmother of several. She became the cultural icon she is now in the 80s, when she had a call-in radio show where listeners could ask questions about sex. Most of us know her as a sexuality expert, of course, but would you believe that after WWII, she was trained as a sharpshooter in the Israeli army?!

But back to the question at hand. Could I interview Dr. Ruth? Frankly, I don't even know if I would be permitted to do such a thing. But I think I'm going to ask. But if they say yes, well, then that's where the real work & worry starts! Help me out... what would YOU ask Dr Ruth?